Today is always a hard one for me… I stand in her doorway with my coffee watching her peacefully sleeping. 3 years ago today I almost lost her and had no idea. I was reluctant to even take her to the doctor over a low grade fever. But because it had persisted for over 4 days and she didn’t want her beloved chocolate milk, I decided I had to find out what was going on. Still in our pj’s, we went in first thing. We were referred to the e.r. for xrays – it’s probably just a blockage in her intestines. These pics are from that day. She was still in her pj’s. I remember how much she was sweating so I had to put her in a fresh top. She still had her silly going when we told her to do “mustache” but she wasn’t very happy. Doctors and nurses rushing around us whispering…throwing words around like cancer and tumor. I heard bits and pieces of conversations …we can’t get a vein, she’s dehydrated, she needs a blood transfusion, critical condition, admission to PICU….All the while you’re thinking “what the hell is happening, she was fine last week, or so I thought.” Then they tell me they are handing us over to the oncologist…a cancer doctor? How the fuck does a 3 year old get cancer? And then to get sent home to gather clothes and necessities because this will be our new home for who knows how long. Seeing her empty bed and her toys left untouched..not knowing if she will ever come home again. Her big sister, scared to death and confused. Her daddy, helpless, and unable to fix this.
Because relapse is such a high probability…this is the stuff that goes through my brain every year at this time. So far she has remained cancer free and I continue to pray for miracles. The further we get from the end of treatment, the better I feel. NED is fabulous but remission is just slightly beyond our reach.
I relive that week over and over… She is tough. We have all been made a little tougher. I stood strong because I had to…scarred from the battle that she should not have survived. But she did.
We all did.
All of you who fought along side us… You mean more to me that you will ever know! Thank you! SALUTE!CIC momma
Wishing you all a very happy father’s day! Hope all you dads out there had a great day!
Brave The Shave- NY peeps….
Check it out if you can!! I hate cancer and I still continue to support those who fight! I encourage you all to still fight! Until there’s a cure, the battle will continue. Who’s child will be next?
Just a quick update on our warrior Jillian’s daddy. The surgery on Tuesday went good and after spending one day in the hospital, they released him. He spent one night at his folks house but today he is home resting. Thank you for all your love and support once again!!!!
CIC momma here. Today was a scary day for the family. It started out like a normal day.. It was Jesse’s weekend to have the girls and the morning started out like any typical Saturday. He dropped Sienna off at girl scouts and then he and Jillian went about their morning. They didn’t get far when Jesse started feeling dizzy and his vision was blurring. It takes a lot to bring this General down, but he knew to pull into a parking lot and call for help.
Next thing I know I’m getting texts and phone calls that I need to pick up Sien from Scouts and that Jesse was in the e.r. And Jilli is there too with her grampa.
After many tests, they found a hole in his heart that possibly caused him to have a mini stroke. The crazy thing is that they saw evidence of him having another stroke within the last year. He will have to have surgery to repair this hole in the next few days.
He is in good spirits and resting comfortably in his hospital room. Right now I am asking for all Jillian’s Army to once again come to battle….
Please send all your love, prayers, energy and well wishes for a successful surgery and speedy healing for General Dad. The girls are very upset that their “daddy has to sleep at the hosible all by himself”…
It breaks my heart to see them so upset. So troops….. I call on you….
Hi troops! CIC momma here with an announcement…
Let’s wish our little warrior a very happy 6th birthday today! She amazes us all with her strength and her determination! So full of energy and spirit. Love her to the moon and back!!! Happy birthday Baby Bear!!!
Looking at my Timehop today, I saw Commander in Chief Mom’s post about Jillian being one year NED (No Evidence of Disease) from a year ago today. The Moore family is so excited to be here now at 2 years cancer free and 1-1/2 years post treatment with clear scans.
Amber’s post a year ago was delayed a day due to the loss of their family dog Sahvin. This quote stuck with me as I re-read her post "Back to trying to find another ‘new normal’. Life is all about change and we all have to learn to adjust."
Here we are a year later and change is still a relevant theme. Change is a constant for all of us and the Moore family is no different. The biggest change this year for Jillian and her sister, Sienna, has been their adjustment to having two houses. Amber and Jesse’s divorce was final at the beginning of the year, and the girls now have two houses and two sets of bedrooms. So if future photos show different houses and different rooms you can understand that they are either at "mommy’s house" or "daddy’s house". They remain friends and talk daily. Amber and Jesse did go through a lot with Jillian being sick, but for the record that isn’t something that they consider a contributing factor to their divorce. They came together just like Jillian’s Army did when Jillian was sick. Because of that, they felt like the Army should be in the loop.
What hasn’t changed is their rank as General Dad and CIC Momma of Jillian’s Army and more importantly the parents of Sienna and Jillian. They appreciate how you have all stood beside them and continued to follow Jiliian’s story. Their extended family and friends appreciate you all as well. Thanks for continuing to care about our little soldier. SALUTE!!
Well good morning troops!!! Yes, I know… We have been MIA for a while now. Life has a crazy way of being BUSY!!!
First the news we all want to hear, Jillian had scans again the last 2 days and remains NED!!! The best news ever!!!! She continues to beat the monster. General dad and I are elated at this news! We can breather again.. At least for another 6 months.
And in other news, Jilli is doing great in Kindergarten and her big sister Sienna is also doing great in school. Life is just one crazy day after another. But I must say, the further we get from treatment, the harder it is to return to the hospital for labs, scans, etc. But we are doing the best we can to return to a normal life.
And hey… What’s normal??? Just a setting on a dryer!
Happy Spring, Happy Easter!!!! Most importantly, happy everyday!!